From a little spark may burst a mighty flame.

Dante Alighieri

Hope is the physician of every misery.

Irish Proverb

Imagine that it’s evening and a storm has knocked out the electricity in your home. You can use the candles for awhile. But you’d like the lights to come back on, and sooner rather than later. So what do you do? You make sure that the light switch is flipped on so that when the power returns, so will the light. Unless you throw that switch, the current won’t get through.

Hope works the same way. Unless you “throw the hope switch,” allowing any hope out there to flow your way, it won’t. It can’t. The circuit isn’t complete.

How do you flip “ON” your hope switch? You open to the possibility that hope exists somewhere, however hopeless or hopeful you feel at the moment. You accept that hope is real and that it works, whether you can prove it or not. You admit that hope can play a vital role in people’s lives, whether it does in yours or not.

You throw the hope switch when you acknowledge that the future is uncertain, which means that the future can go in more than one direction. Consequently, it’s possible for things to turn out better than you expect as well as worse than you wish. You throw that switch when you say, “I think that hope is within the realm of possibility. I may not be sure how or when I’ll have it, but I won’t rule it out of my life forever.” You flip that switch when you pick up a book about hope and remain receptive to what it has to say.

Have you flipped your hope switch? If not, will you do so before you turn this page? Whether or not you hope this moment, can you agree to hope for hope?

 

Excerpt from the book “Finding Hope”  by Ronna Jevne and Jim Miller

To live, it seems, is to accumulate at least some regrets.

Thomas Gilovich & Victoria Husted

The Experience of Regret: What, When, and Why

 

Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets.

Arthur Miller

The Ride Down Mt. Morgan

 

No second chances

There are fewer and fewer

second chances

with each passing year.

 

There is no going back.

No following my dream.

No decades of fulfillment awaiting me.

 

There will be no Carnegie Hall.

There will be no Olympic Gold.

There will be no villa in the Rockies.

 

I have run my race.

Stumbled some.

Crossed the finish line with dignity.

 

There is another realm-

The inner world

crafted by joy and hurt.

 

The world where souls are wounded,

healed or scarred,

by words and deeds.

 

The window for regret

is closing –

Soon.

 

There will be no second chance

To say, “I forgive you.”

To say, “ I love you.”

To say, “Come for tea.”

 

Ever wish you hadn’t said what you just said? Or, ever wish you had spoken up when you were silent? Have you missed an investment opportunity or made an investment that you regret? Ever wondered “what if” about a relationship or a career move?

Regret is the lingering feeling that we have made a wrong decision, chosen an unfulfilling career path, failed at a relationship, made poor use of time, or neglected our health.  

To live fully is to have regrets; they are part of the human condition. Life has continuous forks in the road. They might be momentary missteps that pass quickly into the “oh well” category or they may be major decisions that took you on an irrevocable path.  

Those who confidently say “I have no regrets” are either in denial or have “put lipstick on” their perceived mistakes.

Why reflect on regret at all? Many regrets are simple lessons of life. Other regrets may haunt our present and contaminate our future. Exploring regrets can be a doorway to living life more fully. 

 

Kinds of regrets

There are regrets that stem from action and regrets that stem from inaction. There are regrets that stem from circumstances that were under our control or from circumstances that were not.

We can have BIG regrets or little “oops’. Taking a wrong turn on a freeway and being late is very different than lying to a loved one. There are regrets that involve just ourselves and regrets that involve others. Some regrets can be remediated; other regrets are not eligible for a “re-do”.

The “if only” regrets are often related to timing. If only I had had the funds to go to college. If only we had met sooner. If only I hadn’t been so busy. If only the pandemic hadn’t closed us down. If only I hadn’t missed that plane. If only I had taken that chance.

What regrets do you experience or revisit? Notice if there is a pattern.

• Are they regrets of commission or omission?
• To what degree were the circumstances under your control?
• Is it a BIG regret or an “oops?”
• Is it something you did or something that happened to you?
• Who does the regret involve?

 

The price of regret

Regret is a form of self-imposed suffering, the consequences of which can lead to depression, anxiety, poor sleep, and decision making based on emotion. Regrets serve little purpose except to invite us to review our intentions and behaviors. Yesterday cannot be relived except in your mind.

Making peace with regrets

We tend to idealize the road not taken. Too many of our ‘woulda, shoulda, coulda’ are a result of looking at the missed opportunity as if there was no down side to the path we didn’t take.

Making peace with regret means finding a rightful place in our mind and heart for what is already in the past. A rightful place  doesn’t mean denying the event/fact or dismissing the associated feelings. It means understanding the root of the regret and acknowledging the need to accept what has passed.

It means examining the regret for possible opportunities to do things differently. It may mean choosing to apologize to someone if the regret involves a hurt that you imposed. It may mean forgiving yourself for falling short of perfection.

Paths not taken

Research suggests that actions, or errors of commission, generate more regret in the short term; but inactions, or errors of omission, produce more regret in the long run.

Robert Frost’s famous poem The Road Less Travelled  reminds us that we have a choice. Read his poem and the background about the author and the meaning that has been ascribed to his poem.

Frank Sinatra’s in his classic “ My Way“ sings about our choice to live life our way.

 

Writing strategy: Poetry

 Quote

If I could explain it, I wouldn’t have to write a poem.

author unknown

A poem is not a problem to be solved. It is a voice within us that speaks a truth about what we experience or observe. Poets and poems tell the truth about what it means to be human. Listen and you may hear your inner poet whispering words of regret.

 

If I could do it again

If I could do it again,

would I skip

an immature marriage,

or was it

an immature husband?

You bet I would.

 

If I could do it again,

would I spend ten years

in demanding study

to make the income

of a plumber?

You bet I would.

 

If I could do it again,

would I still be a New Democrat

voting for forty years

for the runner up?

Would I still be

for social justice,

fair wages,

equal access to healthcare?

You bet I would.

 

If I could do it again,

would I work less,

read more,

take more walks?

Would I spend more time

with a mother

who left us early?

You bet I would.

 

If I could do it again,

would I have remarried

if I had known

my honeymoon

would be in a cardiac care unit?

Would I have taken the chance,

knowing I was walking

the widow’s walk.

You bet I would.

Invitation to write a poem

Haven’t thought of yourself as a poet? Experiment. You may be surprised. 

 

Need an opening line?

 

            I regret…

            I wish I had…

            If only…

            I will never know…

            I will always wonder…

            If I could do it again…

 

Poetry Reading References:

           Poetry as reflection: Writing Poetry to Save Your Life by Maria Mazziotti Gillan

            For older people: I Never Told Anybody by Kenneth Koch

            Why poetry is good for our health

           For youth: Writing with at Risk Youth by Richard Gold

 

Photo question of the month:

 

What have you done for which you have no regrets?

 

Time is the coin of life.

Only you can determine how it will be spent.

                                              Carl Sandburg

 

Mary Oliver in her poem The Summer Day leaves us with the question, “What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”

How would you reply to her question?

The Language of Time

Our culture encodes multiple messages about time into our language .

We take time.

We make time.

We take time out.  

We take time off.  

Time flies when you are having fun.

Time can be lost, gained and wasted.

We have war times and peace times; hard times and good times.

We have festive times and sad times.

Qualities of time

We have Mother Earth but we have Father Time.

As we age we are called “old timers”. There seem to be no “young timers”.

Time is precious; we are to value time.

Time is money.

We speak of their being “signs of the time.”

Even scripture speaks eloquently about time. Ecclesiates 3: 1-8, is a cherished Bible passage suggesting that over our lifetime there is A time for everything.

The measure of time

Our timing can be wrong.

We can even have too much time on our hands.

Time passes quickly or time passes slowly.

Things can take a long time or a short time.

We have feelings about people who are late, or early.

We divide time into units – decades or years or eras.

The demands of time

To be “short” of time, is to be pressured for time.

We are paid in intervals of time –  by the hour, week, or month.

For many projects, timing is everything.

• Too much time in the oven ruins a roast. Too little time leaves it too rare.
• Invest at the “right” time, you make money. Invest at the wrong time and your investments drop.

         We are expected to manage our time. 

Relationships require quality time.

We are slaves to deadlines.

The experience of time 

We all have the same amount of time in a day but not in a lifetime.

Our perception of time changes over time. At ten, a year is 10 percent  of our life. At eighty, a year is 1.25% of our life. No wonder if feels like time is passing quickly.

Time for reflection is treated like a luxury. Busyness is privileged over quiet time. Yet,  

A reflective life takes time but so does repeating the stupid moments of our lives…When I am 80, I want to feel 80. I want to have earned the wrinkles, enjoyed the peace, know what my life was about…I want to have enjoyed noticing my life. Not wake up at some undesignated age wondering where I have been and what I have been doing for 20 years, unable or unwilling to accept responsibility for how I have used my time.

                           Adapted from Living Life as a Writer by  R. Jevne

 

Our relationship to time changes over time. What takes priority at one time in our life changes.

          In our senior years, we savor time.

I don’t do hurry well any more.

It isn’t that I dawdle.

I just don’t do hurry well any more.

 

Being on time still matters

But I start a few minutes late

Thinking everything moves

Like it did thirty years ago

When really –

I just don’t do hurry well anymore.

 

I don’t do hurry well any more.

It’s not all bad.

I savour my morning tea.

I notice the dew on the deck.

I wonder –

who designed the hummingbird?

 

I don’t do hurry well anymore.

I let the silence be.

I have no interest in the news.

It’s enough to brush my teeth

without an update on Syria.

It’s enough to eat a breakfast of privilege.

and be grateful.

 

I don’t do hurry well anymore.

I want my soul to walk-

To leave the human “race” to others.

I want to see what I once missed.

What I once scurried by

in the name of efficiency.

I want to taste the jam on my toast.

I want my friend to feel heard.

 

I don’t do hurry well anymore.

I don’t have time to do hurry well any more.

               By Ronna Jevne

 

Tune in to Time

Listen to “Time in a Bottle” and ask yourself, “With whom do I want to spend time?”. It might be just one person or it might be many.

 

 

Use writing to explore your relationship to time

Select a routine week. Do a time log. Time logs record your activities, often in 15 or 30 minute segments. At the end of the week, you will have a record of what you have done with “your one wild and precious life.”

 Review the log.

• Any surprises?
• Anything you would like to do differently?
• If someone ran a video of your life for the week, what would they conclude are your values?

From your time log,  list:

• the times you most enjoyed
• the time you spent on the daily life requirements (sleeping, bathing, eating)
• things that you feel were a waste of time
• times when you felt pressured for time.

Based on your reflections, schedule time to do what you truly would like to do – how you would like to live “your one wild and precious life”.

 

 

 

 

 

 

We are one leaf on the great human tree.

 

                                               Pablo Neruda

 

Putting our mark on the world

It is human nature to want to make a difference. A key question to ask ourselves is “what difference am I making?

We are each continuously making a difference. We do so with each action and by each inaction;

• by what we say and by our silence;
• by our presence and by our absence;
• by our kindness and by our cruelty;
• by our passion and by our indifference.

What is your definition of “making a difference”?

The difference we make influences our own lives, the lives of those around us, the life of our community, and our nation.

Making a difference in your own life

Every day involves a multitude of choices about your personal life. When you make healthy choices about what you eat and drink, you nourish your physical being. When you get enough rest, you enhance your body’s restorative powers.

When you socialize with supportive like-minded people, you experience the gifts of friendship. When you read or take a course, your brain gets exercised.

When you take a pause from the noise of the electronic world. When you sit quietly beside a brook in silence, hearing your voice of reason and the song that your heart sings, you are making a difference to your inner life.

Every time you confront your fears. Every time you accept your own humanness. Every time you forgive yourself or someone who you feel violated you. You are making a difference.

Every time you choose words wisely rather than using uncensored insensitive language. You are making a difference in your life and in the lives of others.

What are the differences that you are making to your personal life?

Making a difference in the life of others

As an individual you influence others daily. Every time you listen to a friend, provide guidance to a child, encourage your spouse. Every time you confront your partner, are present for a floundering teenager, bring a casserole to a neighbor. Every time you respect the speed limit, you reach out to an estranged member of the family, sit in silence with a grieving person. You are making a remarkable difference.

When you surprise someone with a visit, send a card, or lighten a neighbor’s load, someone’s life is positively influenced.

You are making a difference when you realize you are not the center of the universe. That your pain, however deep, is a shared pain.

A pain shared by every parent who has lost a child. Every spouse who has had to say a premature goodbye. Every athlete who whose body could not achieve what her mind could imagine.

Every entrepreneur whose dream evaporated for reasons outside of their control. Every home owner who has faced foreclosure. Every elder who is aging alone. Every street person who could never have envisioned a life of shame.

When you strive to  understand someone else’s pain or viewpoint, you are building a bridge to mutual understanding.

What are the differences that you are making to the life of others?

Making a difference in your community/nation

When you rise in the morning and are interested in making the world a better place, you are making a difference.

When you donate blood, learn CPR (cardiopulmonary resuscitation), carry safety equipment when travelling, keep your vehicle in good repair, you are making a difference to the larger community.

When you participate in political life by voting, raise funds for a worthy charity, write your political representative, constructively share you views, you are influencing the larger community. When you rally to assist in local, regional, national or international crises, you are making a difference in the world.

When you work collectively with others, your influence is often magnified. Think about the collective efforts that have touched your life. The Red Cross, the many groups responding to specific illness, amateur theatre groups. The list is endless.

The Famous Five changed the destiny of women in Canada. Five Alberta women worked relentlessly to have women in Canada legally designated as “persons”. Previous to the 1929 Persons’ Case, women were not people in the eyes of the law.

What are the differences that you are making to the greater community?

A single candle can bring light to a cave.

Avoiding evaluation of your contributions

Just as it is human nature to want to make a difference, it is human nature to want to judge whether we have met the mark. There is a temptation to be judge and jury of our own well intentioned deeds.

Not every action leads to the intended outcome. Sometimes a seemingly insignificant action has considerable influence. At other times, a well-planned intervention executed with precision falls short of the anticipated results.

It is possible to overstate our influence, but more often we minimize the difference that we are making. It is common for people to say, “All I did was listen.” Listening actually makes a huge difference. Given an opportunity to be heard, people often  resolve their own concerns. Being heard is sometimes the first step for them to make a difference in their own lives.

Change takes place on its own schedule. We may see immediate differences we individually or collectively made.  On the other hand, the seeds of change may take time to mature.

A First Nations woman being interviewed about her work with recently released female inmates convincingly asserted, “I don’t concern myself with making a difference. I see hope as a chain. It is only important that I am not the link that breaks the chain”. 

All of us make a difference. There are times when we diminish our sense of contribution by comparing ourselves to individuals who we feel made a significant difference in a single event. Heroic actions catch our attention because of the dramatic way in which they illustrate the difference one person can make.

Desmond Doss, the character portrayed in the film Hacksaw Ridge, who enlisted as a medic while refusing to carry a gun, was singlehandedly responsible for rescuing 75 men from one of the bloodiest battles of WW11.

Harriet Tubman, once escaping from slavery to Canada, risked her life to free at least 45 other black men and women from the US. The underground railway she forged made life altering differences in each of those lives.

Sometimes, one single event has a huge sphere of influence. More often though, the difference is made in a series of cumulative events. Maurice Hilleman, who has been credited with developing over 40 vaccines, could not have known that when he went to his lab each morning for years that he eventually would save more lives than any other medical scientist of the 20th century.

People like Nelson Mandala, Desmond Tutu, the Dali Lama, Mother Teresa, Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln and Albert Einstein, now household names, lived a lifetime of personal devotion within the a committed community. The energy of many individual contributors were what made their outstanding outcomes possible.

No one makes a difference alone but it often starts with one person, a person committed a vision of change.

What is your style?

Kindness

Words can work magic, and words can deliver harm.  Words can condemn or redeem. The choice of words is ours to make. A kind word can inspire. A kind word can encourage. A kind word can heal. You cannot actually measure the ripple effect of a generous gesture. Generosity and kindness are infectious. Often the sphere of influence of one act travels beneficially outward but the resulting improved outcomes go unmeasured.

Advocacy

Taking action on behalf of a cause or a person makes a difference. When you accompany someone to their medical appointment, lobby for policy that furthers a senior housing project, take a stand on climate change, you make a difference.

Young Greta Thunberg, the Swedish teenage climate change activist, is a striking example of the fact that making a difference is not limited by our age, old or young.

Amnesty International is an example of individuals acting collectively while making a magnified difference. Seven million people in over 150 countries are working together to protect and promote human rights.

Service

Kindness and advocacy are forms of service. Service takes many forms. When you use your time to serve on a Board of a worthy organization or serve food in a soup kitchen, you make a difference. When you are a scout leader, a hockey coach, or a volunteer firefighter, you are serving your community.

How can writing make a difference?

Mary Pipher claims that writers can inspire a more kind, more fair, more beautiful world. Alternatively writers can incite selfishness, stereotyping and violence. Writers can unite people or divide them.

In her book, Writing to Change the World Mary refers to the many ways that we can make a positive difference with written words. Furthermore, she suggests how we can maximize that difference.

Any form of writing can change the world. No genre is excluded. Whether your form is poetry, essay, story, dialogue, letter, blog or song, you can use your talents in the service of what you consider to be important goals.

Research

Writing a simple thank you note makes a difference , a study providing evidence of the benefits to both the originator and the receiver of the thank you note.

Readings

Words are the most powerful tools at our disposal. With them, writers have saved lives and taken them, brought justice and confounded it, started wars and ended them. Writers can change the way we think and transform our definitions of right and wrong.

In Writing to Change the World, Martha Pipher reveals the power of words. As a writer and therapist, she uses “rousing commentary, personal anecdotes, memorable quotations, and stories of writers who have helped reshape society”. This book may inspire you to use the written word to change the world.

Enjoy these three short videos below that demonstrate the power of one can make a difference.

1) The starfish story.

2) A kindness video

3) A Ukrainian youth choir singing “You raise me up”.

Strategy of the month

Refer to letter writing strategy published in April of 2021, link below.

Letter Writing Strategy (April, 2021)

What do you feel strongly about?

Craft a letter to the editor on a subject about which you have an opinion .

Not confident? This letter to the editor guide will help you. Decide later whether you will send the letter. Just practice. Whether or not you send your letter, your will have clarified your own views.

Photo reflection of the month

 

The effect of one good hearted person is incalculable

                                                                  Oscar Arias

Write a thank you letter to someone who has made a difference in your life. Detail what they did and how it has affected you. It could be a colleague, a friend, a teacher. Whoever they are, they left a footprint on your heart. Tell them how grateful you are that there are people like them creating simple life changing inspirations with no expectations of being rewarded. Let them know. Then, send it to them with no expectation of a reply

 

 

 

Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion,

Our most inexhaustible source of magic.

Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it.

                                        Albus Dumbledore (J. K. Rowling)

 

Health warning

Magic is not a substitute for rational living. It won’t actually change the color of traffic lights. It won’t change salt to sugar in your tea. Magic won’t make you able to run a marathon. Training will be the magic that does that.

It won’t fix a flat tire. It might feel like magic if the driver of the vehicle that stops to help is a mechanic who just happens to have a jack and a spare tire.

What is Magic?

Magic is not just what the authors of Harry Potter, Star Wars, the Narnia Series or the Hobbit can do. They can turn gravel to gold with words.

Our own imaginations are amazing. We can all create superheroes, whimsical characters and unlikely outcomes, not only in fiction, but also in reality.

We can transport ourselves from a state of anger to hearty laughter; from a funk to an inspiration; from a setback to leap of faith; from a boring task to a fun activity; from resentful victim to forgiving saint.

How do we know when it’s magic?

We know it’s magic by the feeling we have. The feeling is a surprisingly fresh unanticipated positive response. The outcome delights us. The reaction is a smile.

Magic is often initiated by pretending that you have already achieved your happy ending. Sometime between childhood and adulthood, we stop enjoying our pretending. We dampen our response to magic.

It seems when reason invades, imagination fades. We begin to focus on problems rather than possibilities.

When was the last time that you had that magical feeling that something was amazing? That something was unexplainable. That sense of awe that you may have described as astonishing, mind-blowing, mystifying, baffling or just sheer magic? When did you last open your heart to possibility, to the idea that seemingly impossible things sometimes change?

A magician amazes us with the unexpected. When the unexpected is unexplainable, we feel that magic moment. With amazement comes fun, a smile and often gratitude.

Where has magic happened for you?

            In music

For some, music is magic. Often lyrics are not even required.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLxOaGG7MkA.

Psychology Today featured an article, The Magic of Music: Music as therapy. The article lists 16 uplifting songs.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/hide-and-seek/201810/the-magic-music

            In art

For some people, art lifts them to another realm. They feel what the artist felt; see what the artist saw; perhaps even hear what the artist might have heard. There are no words for being touched by the reality or beauty of a piece of art. Time and space are transcended.

            In nature

For others, nature is the enchanting sorcerer. Nature itself has limitless examples of how plants and animals magically adapt to changing environments.

Nora Roberts writes “Magic exists. Who can doubt, when there are rainbows and wildflowers, the music of the wind and the silence of the stars?”

To use the words of magic, we become spell bound by the beauty of nature.

            In treasured relationships

Nora Roberts, author of 225 romance novels, asserts that anyone who has loved has been touched by magic. It might be romance but it also might be the giggle of your first granddaughter. It might be a phone call from an old friend the very same hour you were thinking of him. It might be seeing the toddler you raised receive his wings on the tarmac of the air field.

            In the digital world

Arthur Clarke writes, “Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic”.

For those of us that predate the computer era, the digital world feels like magic. Ordering groceries, taking a watercolor course, visiting with friends in Sweden, all without even leaving home, is commonplace in this day and age. Now if that isn’t magic, what is?

Flip a switch and lights go on. Change the channel that you are watching without leaving your chair. Start your car on a cold day without going outside. A voice named Siri tells you where to turn on your way to a new destination.

            In reading or writing

Words are magical in that they affect our hearts and minds. Words can inspire us to pretend a pleasant experience. They can engender compassion. They can move us to action. They can make our heart smile.

Do you have a favorite novelist, poet, story writer, or documentary journalist whose writing you love to read?

What do you read that feels like magic? That has led you to  see the world differently? What book has taken you to adventure or enchanted lands? How are you different when you read what you love to read? Theodora Goss says that a writer is very much like a wizard making magic with words, sometimes changing the world for the better.

Therapeutic writing is writing that changes our inner world, invites us to imagine creative solutions, consoles our despair, and heals our wounds.

When we write about what we love, we feel better. That is magic.

Researchers initially thought that in order for writing to be therapeutic, it had to address trauma. We know now that isn’t the case. Writing about positive outcomes is known to lift us up.

To use the words of Anias Nin, we write “to taste life twice”. She adds, “When I don’t write, I feel that my world is shrinking. I feel like I am in prison. I feel I lose my fire and my color. Writing should be a necessity. As the sea needs to heave, I liken writing to breathing.”

How does magic happen?

Magic often happens in a moment. A moment when we realize stressors are normal. When we define obstacles as opportunities. When we use words that inject fun into overly serious situations. When we notice and name the joys found in everyday experiences.

We don’t need a slight of hand or blink of an eye. We just need words – words we tell ourselves, words we say to others, and words we write.

The work of magic

Sometimes magic takes time. Lee Crockerell, a retired Executive Vice President of Walt Disney World for over a decade writes in his book Creating Magic, “It’s not the magic that makes it work; it’s the way we work that makes it magic.”

The words we use to define our lives create the lives we live. Redefining our experience with constructive language positions us to live our lives differently.

Our pen can be our magical wand

The “work” we need to do with is to notice the language we are using to describe our problems, our strengths, our delights and our discouragements. With that awareness, ask the question, “What words can I use that would help me to see this or that differently?”

How to tune into the magic channel

Creating magic can be fun. Play with ideas and words.

• If by magic, tomorrow is a surprisingly good day, what would I have done differently?
• When I tell this same story a year from now, how could I tell it with some humor?
• Is there one word I need to hear right now? What would that word be?
• Practice exchanging neutral or negative words with words that are positive, energizing, or humorouss. Instead of problem solving, try possibility generating. Instead of lazy, try motivationally challenged. Instead of mountain, try overgrown molehill.

Remember that our life can be changed in a sentence.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qpcB82aUz4

The words “tell me more” may change, not only your life, but someone else’s.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UDXtFbSmBAg

Reading:

We tend to think of magic as moments in time and as individual occurrences. Can magic happen for groups of people on an enduring basis? Lee Cockerell believes it can. In his book Creating Magic,  he reflects on the success of Disney World. He describes how the core values of honesty, integrity, respect, courage, balance and diversity contribute to magic in our lives and in the lives of others.

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/29183/creating-magic-by-lee-cockerell/

Research

People often ask, “Do I need to write about problems or trauma to receive the benefits of journaling?”

A recent study using Web based Positive Affective Journalling, an adaptation of the original expressive writing protocol, would suggest not.

Positive Affective Journalling was found to be effective in reducing some aspects of mental distress and improving aspects of well-being among medical patients experiencing anxiety.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6305886/

Strategy of the Month: Magic coupons  

Imagine that in today’s mail, there was a curious envelope. Perhaps it is an unusual shape or colour. It has no postmark. In it is a dated coupon for each of the next 21 days. Each coupon bestows you with the ability to see magic during that day. You cannot accumulate the coupons. Each coupon is only good for that day -so no storing them up. Each day you can activate the next coupon by writing, if only briefly, about the magic you experienced.

There is magic in every one of our days. Take time to recognize it and document it.

Photo prompt of the month:

 

 

Pretend that the mother-ship in the photo above is landing in your back yard to deliver magic to your life. Pretend that you engage the friendly visitors and then write about the encounter and the plentiful positive outcomes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What makes a fire burn

is space between the logs,

a breathing space.

         Judy Brown

                                        –from poem “this is from fire”

At the end of any activity cycle (or at the beginning), one of the essential principles of “having dreams come true” is resting and relaxing yourself.

Easier said than done, since most of us are committed to being productive, efficient and relentless, striving toward our goal to accomplish.

Pause creates a healthy space for renewal.

Pausing is something that we can practice on a very small scale, a practice that refreshes us without threatening the continuity of our involvement in life. Pausing can be as simple as a five second glance at the wind in the leaves, or the warm smile returned from your friendly wave toward someone.

Relaxing momentarily in that pleasant, quiet moment creates a space for your next creative move. Relaxing in the moment sets you up to Opening to the next breath and to the inspiration centred in the activity that you are enjoying.

In that new space, Trusting then becomes easy. You are more able to trust that your dreams are unfolding slowly and gently in a manner that is very comfortable and rewarding.

Pause, Relax, Open, Trust. Say these words often and gently to yourself.

Or explore these words on paper using one of the writing strategies on our web site.

_____________________________________________

Our work at Prairie Wind is momentarily pausing at this time in order to shift the location of our home. We are leaving our pastoral home in the country, to live in a peaceful community in the big city – a home that is closer to many of our aging friends, a home that offers fewer physical demands, a home nearer many amenities and requiring less travel.

We plan to suspend our newsletter for a month or two while we relocate, after which we will continue exploring the joys of writing and your meaningful participation.

 

Images of our memories repeat,

like the fading echo of a trumpet in a mountain valley.

                                                                          Joseph Palmar

When you walk down memory lane, what comes to your mind?

With almost every image, there is an echo. With almost every memory, there is an accompanying image.  There may be feelings of warmth, joy, inspiration, nostalgia, regret, or pain.

Recalling pleasant experiences

A faded image of Grandma holding you on her knee brings back the treasured experience of freshly baked cinnamon buns. Your mouth may still water.

The year book photo of Rob whispers, “He was so neat. I wonder what happened to him.” In a moment you relive his awkward words just before your first dance.

A hearty laugh echoes the enjoyment of the mud fight caught on film by your mom who captured the experience rather than being concerned about extra laundry.

The image of the old barn and hay slings recalls the carefree days of summer on the farm.

In the album of the trip to Colorado, the Grand Canyon still brings forth a sense of awe.

Your heart still swells with pride, each time the remembered image occurs of your son’s salute as he accepts his “wings” on the air force tarmac.

Images that echo from the future

Echoes from the past are logical. Echoes from the unknown are understandably mystical. Your future can speak to you through images.

The neighbour’s travelogue, a homemade slide show bespeaks of your yet unformulated plans for a trek abroad.

The unique image on the book cover of a bookstore display deepens your dream of writing that novel that yet evades you.

In his hip waders, Bill is captured dancing with delight as he shows off his prized catch of trout, and in so doing tempts you to organize that long imagined fishing trip.

Learning from images

The use of photography in mental health dates back a century and a half. It has been used by educators, clinicians, and researchers to reveal new understandings of our own  psychological world. We can learn a great deal about ourselves from the photos we take.

To participate in therapeutic photography you don’t need a fancy camera or membership in a camera club. An iPhone is sufficient. The object is not a flawless image. It is noticing how you see the world. Photographs can assist us in organizing our lives as a story. Many wonderful projects demonstrate the contribution of image to understanding families and communities, enhancing self-esteem, intensifying focus, and improving coping skills.

Examples of the benefits of capturing images

The contribution of photography to mental health is well documented. My own experience with people confirms just that.

A single young mom whose severely handicapped son passed away at twelve years of age was mistakenly counselled that her future now had more options. Conventional grief counselling was failing. She found solace by putting together a memoir of photographs of her son along with written reflections.

An adult female was distracted by the obvious distortions caused by her muscular dystrophy. She had a head and shoulders portrait taken that captured her true self.

A project with youngsters used photography to demonstrate that in many ways our brains are cameras. We all take still and video recordings of our life experiences! Being taught the basics of good photography helped these young people recognize that they could soften images in their mind that were captured during trauma. They demonstrated considerable improvement of their processing of difficult images.

At the Hope Foundation, hope deficit clients were given a disposable camera to take a photograph that represented hope before their next appointment. Even when they reported that they could not find an image of hope, they were occupied all week looking for hope.

Camera and Pen

The roots of the words of “photography” are “to paint with light”.

Combining your camera and your pen can add depth to your journaling experience. Photo journalling is more than illustrating your journal entries with pictures. As you take note of your photographic preferences, you will begin to notice that life comes in shades, and that there are always degrees of light and darkness; that some things are best out of focus, and sharp focus is only necessary under some circumstances.

Recalling images that evoke feelings

Some photos evoke neither memories nor dreams. Rather, it is an emotion that is summoned forth as a response:

A smile comes across your face as you gaze on the unknown laughing child.

Compassion or pity goes out to a homeless man whose despair is recorded by a foreign correspondent in the area hit hardest by a cyclone.

The image of a wolf shot from the air, and not only with a camera, jolts you out of complacency to join the naturalist movement.

The scene hanging over the fireplace in your favourite restaurant nourishes you.

The poster of thousands of owner-built planes at the annual air show tweaks your long buried interest in flying.

At the gallery, it is a gnarled tree that captures your attention.

Walking near the majesty of the waterfall, it is a quiet eddy that tempts you to press the shutter.

At the rodeo, you find yourself scanning the crowd rather than the cowboys for a candid shot.

In a cathedral, one stained glass window speaks to you in a language you cannot decipher. Your soul seems to come home as you gaze upon it. You point and shoot, hoping the light is sufficient.

Time and time again, you find yourself photographing aging architecture that echoes a yearning for which you have no words.

Recalling ambivalent images and echoes

A framed black and white image of the quiet wooded path shrouded in the morning mist awakens the last conversation you shared with a trusted friend before war forever snatched him away.

Your brother’s convocation photograph echoes your failure to complete college. Your absence in the family portrait publicly announces your estrangement.

At the sight of the schoolyard photo located in the museum, you recollect the taunts endured because you spoke English poorly the first couple of years after immigrating.

Recommended reading

Creative Guide to Exploring Your Life: Self-Reflection Using Photography, Art, and Writing. by Graham Gordon Ramsay and Holly Barlow Sweet.

This creative guide to exploring and understanding who you are, what you value, and what you wish to achieve brims with imaginative exercises and examples that use the power of photography, art, and writing as tools for self-discovery. It provides clear and accessible guidance on how to explore different parts of your identity. Exercises are accompanied by searching questions for self-reflection, and are complemented by examples of each exercise to provoke ideas and inspiration. Featuring additional guidance for teachers, counselors, and other professionals running the exercises in group settings, this book offers a dynamic and enjoyable way for you to explore different aspects of your life.

Images and Echoes: Exploring your life with photography and writing edited by Dr. R. Jevne.

This beautifully illustrated hardcopy book captures the explorations of seventeen women who reveal their stories through writing and images. Join them as they delve into the worlds we commonly call family, work, learning, healing, relationships, and spirituality. Explore with them, your inner and outer life as they take you from place to place and from chaos to stability.

Little Book of Contemplative Photography: Seeing with wonder, respect, and humility by Howard Zehr (2005). Published by Good Books, PA.

With this book, Zehr makes a gift to anyone who would like to connect photography to seeing and thinking more deeply. In each chapter he offers a Purpose, a Problem, and an Activity with a camera in order to “practice mindfulness.” The author suggests that the value of experiences will be increased if you journal during or after the exercises.

Photo Essays

Photo essays are a wonderful window into the inner lives of different human experiences.  Here are a couple of my favourites:

I’m not crazy, I just lost my glasses: Portraits and Oral Histories of people who have been in and out of mental institutions

Lonny Shavelson (1986), published by De Novo Press, CA. This book humanizes the experience of “madness” and related treatment, not in abstract jargon but in commonplace language of the wounded.  We experience these people with faces and voices of their own, with stories to tell. It is worth asking your library if they can access a copy for you.

Doing Life: Reflections of Men and Women Serving Life Sentences by Howard Zehr.

Long-time advocate of social justice, Zehr suggests that we “tend not to see victims or offenders as real people. We seldom understand crime as it is actually experienced; as a violation of real people by real people.” The author combines photographs and interviews to answer the questions, “What does it mean, for those experiencing it, to be locked up for life, with little or no possibility of ever returning to society?”

Research

An increasing body of research includes photography as a source of data. Studies of the human condition, human experience, and action research have all benefited from the combination of photography and writing.

There is ample evidence that our photography reflects our personal way of seeing the world. As early as 1990, Robert Ziller in Photographing the self: methods of observing personal orientations summarized the use of photography in the study of the self. Since then photography and reflective writing have been used in combination in qualitative studies to explore human experience.

PhotoVoice

PhotoVoice is a participatory action research method that employs photography and group dialogue as a means for marginalized individuals to deepen their understanding of  community issues or concerns.

PhotoVoice believes that everybody should have the opportunity to represent themselves and tell their own story. They work in partnership all over the world on projects and activities that combine ethical photography and community participation to help deliver positive social change.

Strategy of the month – Free Fall Writing

Photography can be combined with almost any writing strategy. In this newsletter we will use “Free Fall writing”.

Place yourself in a setting which you are comfortable. Get into a space of silence and solitude. Let the inner chatter drift away. If the chatter persists, write it down until it subsides.

Then, sit quietly with the photograph (below) in front of you, preferably with it propped against something so you can look at it and it can look back at you. Wait in silence. Begin writing when a voice seems to speak. It may be yours. It may seem to come from the photograph. It is important to simply let the process unfold.

At some point, the flow of ideas will cease. This free fall writing is best done without fussing about sentence structure, spelling, grammar, or logic.

Photo question of the month

 

What comes to mind when you imagine yourself in this picture?

Please use free-fall writing for your answer.

 

 

Not everything matters equally.

                                  Gary Keller

and

Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.

                                               Oscar Wilde

The Yes/No dilemma 

Many of us have been programmed to say “yes” in life.

We have been given many reasons to say yes:

• It is polite.
• It is unselfish.
• It is proper in order to advance a civilized society.
• It is what good people do.

 

We have been given many reasons that we shouldn’t say no:

• There will be punishment if we do say no.
• There will be privileges lost if we do say no.
• We will lose friends if we say no.
• It is socially unacceptable to say no.
• We will miss an opportunity if we say no.

When someone makes a request, ask yourself what motivates me to say “yes”?

Some healthy reasons to say “yes” are:

• I want to be helpful.
• I am qualified to be helpful.
• I have time to be helpful.
• The work doesn’t conflict with my current priorities.
• The work doesn’t conflict with my essential values.
• The work doesn’t compete for my planned activities.

Under what circumstances do you feel most comfortable saying “no”? Have you found yourself saying “yes” when you know your heart is saying “no”?

There may be a truth to the saying, “If you want something done, ask a busy person”. However, hardworking enthusiasts can take on too many assignments.

There are times and events when our lives are temporarily unbalanced, and we would be wise not to take on anything else. We may be able to respond affirmatively at one time in our life and not at another time for an identical request.

The importance of saying “no”      ……………

• Learning to say “no” is neither synonymous with being self-centered nor ignoring the needs of others.  Saying “yes” when you need to say “no” takes its toll over time.
• When we do and say things that are not consistent with how we feel, we chip away at our self-respect. Betraying ourselves eventually leads to disliking ourselves.
• Saying “no” expands the space we have to respond to our priorities. Responding too often to the demands of others diverts us from our goals. Our dreams may slip away. What goals are you postponing?
• A feeling that others are structuring  our life often builds resentment and later anger. Who are you beginning to resent?
• When we say “yes” but our posture, facial expression and mood convey “no”, the communication is confusing.
• All of us have limited energy and time. The emotional forerunners of fatigue are feeling too busy, overworked, irritable, hassled, or discouraged. How is your emotional and physical reserve?
• Individuals and relationships are the most healthy when each person has control over and is responsible for their own life choices. Without freedom of choice, we feel at  the mercy of other’s expectations and demands.
• If we can say “yes” or “no” with confidence our sense of control increases. Saying “no” can be a valid and useful skill.

The Yes Traps

No” is the first word many of us learn to say. Most two-year-old children can proclaim it emphatically to anyone or anything that imposes on their world. By adulthood, we have lost the capacity to say “no” straightforwardly, comfortably, and quietly. We have fallen into the “yes” traps.

The most common “yes “ traps are:

• The compassion trap: This person is prone to taking care of someone else’s needs at the expense of their own. It is somehow irresistible to be needed. He or she loves to be needed.
• The super – mom/dad/boss trap: The recognition that comes with being a hero or heroine is the attraction. He or she loves to be seen as remarkable, as going the extra mile.
• The door mat trap: The “door mat” accepts that others have a right to make unreasonable demands. Doormats feel that they don’t have a right to say “no”.
• The peace maker trap: The peacemaker will avoid conflict at almost any cost. He or she would rather overwork than disagree.  They hate conflict.
• Deviations from “no” and “yes”:

No but

• Saying “no” but feeling guilty about being: inadequate, lazy, or uncaring.
• Saying “no”  but feeling resentful or even angry that others don’t recognize you are already overextended.
• Deferring to someone else to make the decision.  “Ask your mother”, or “Ask you father” really means “I don’t want to be the one to say “no”.
• Accompanying “no” with multiple apologies and a detailed explanation of how your life has been recently complicated.

Yes but

• Redefining the issue by refusing to discuss the real issue. Changing the topic is not an answer.
• Saying “yes” and then demonstrating you are miserable doing what you agreed to. This is a martyrdom training ground.
• Pleading inadequacy by declaring that you would to say “yes” but you tried to respond to such a request once and failed.
• Saying “yes” but then not actually doing what you agreed to. It doesn’t take long before others realize you can’t be trusted to follow through.

Ask yourself:

• In what circumstances is it most difficult for you to say “no”? To whom is it hardest to say no?
• What has influenced you with regard to saying “no”?
• Have you had experiences when you have said “no” and regretted it?
• What were the consequences?
• Have you regrets about a missed opportunity or a damaged relationship?

Practice saying “no”

• Assess the request: Is the request reasonable? Use your definition of reasonableness.. What are your values and your resources? Do you have the time, the skills, and the energy to do this? What are the consequences of saying “no”, for yourself and the requester.
• Gather information you need: What do you need to know in order to make a decision?
• Allow yourself time: You don’t need to answer at the time you are asked. It takes time to see the request through the lens of your needs, values, and resources.
• Ask yourself: Do I really want to do this? Am I trying to please someone? Am I falling into one of the “yes” traps?
• Practice: Say “no” with confidence. It is helpful to give a simple “no” rather than long winded statements filled with justifications. If you wish you explain, do it simply. Initially practice in low emotional situations.
• Conviction: A “no” with eye contact and a firm but compassionate voice reinforces your conviction.
• Repeat: Manual J. Smith in When I say no, I feel guilty, calls this the “broken record” technique. It does take practice to outlast a persistent requester.
• Remind yourself: Have a poster on the back of your door or an index card in your wallet that says “It is okay to say no”.
• Evaluate yourself: Did I face the issue? Did I avoid “detours to no”? How okay do I feel with my decision?
• Reward yourself: For you, what would be a reward for saying “no” to demands that tax you?
• Love yourself: Love yourself enough to set boundaries.
• You only get one life. You have the right to choose how to use it. Saying “no” is often not easy. It is however, healthy and necessary. “Sometimes “No” is the kindest word.”

Recommended readings

Here are two popular classics:

When I say no, I feel guilty by Manual J. Smith

I particularly appreciate the author’s attention to “assertive rights” and specific skills that help accompany the expression of those basic rights. This best-seller is a first step to being able to say “no” without guilt. Whether you need to say “no” to your kids, your boss or your mother-in-law, this is an excellent guide.

Don’t say Yes when you want to say No: Making life right when it feels all wrong by Herbert Fensterheim.

This best- selling classic takes a somewhat different slant. It focuses on contexts in which you may want to be more assertive – social situations, marriage, sexual relations, family, and work setting. It provides many case examples and exercises.

Research

Seriously interested in the role of assertiveness and mental health? This readable, academic article, “Assertiveness Training: A Forgotten Evidence-Based Treatment” in Clinical Psychology Science and Practice is an excellent overview of the research covering clinical problems, populations, and contexts.

https://www.sunysb.edu/commcms/psychology/_pdfs/faculty/Speed_et_al-2017-Clinical_Psychology__Science_and_Practice.pdf

Strategy of the Month:

Rehearsals

The expression, “It is no time to learn to swim when you are drowning” fits here.

Rehearsing “no” in your mind to an anticipated request is not the same as saying “no” to someone who is standing in front of you.

Julie Murphy says, “Tone is the hardest part of saying no.” When we feel pressured to say “yes”, we may respond with defensiveness, annoyance, or with childlike submission. By practicing, we develop that ability to stay focused on the request and the answer. Writing out the rehearsal helps.

It is useful to practice saying “no” in situations that have low emotional overtones. What would one or two of those situations be for you? Perhaps it is as simple as how to say “no” to someone who wants you to have a second helping of desert. Write out your response. Practice it out loud in front of mirror or on a recording.

Move on to more challenging situations. Who is the person? What is the context? What do you see as the consequences for yourself and/or for the requester?

Then, write out your response. Short is good. A brief explanation may be appropriate. Review your rehearsal for the “detours to no””. Rewrite until you are satisfied. Practice. Invite someone that you trust to listen and provide you with feedback.

If you have issues about saying “no” in office contexts you may benefit from the use of a template. “Office ninjas” offers templates for responding to e mails asking you to do various things to which you want to respond politely to with a “no”.

 

Photo Question of the month

           

If YES and NO were in a game, what game would you name it?

In the above image who is winning, and write down why would you say that?

 

 

Accepting your history need not be your destiny.

                                                                 Joseph Palmar

 

Decluttering our lives

Seasoned travelers learn to travel light. The more baggage they carry, the more work that is required, and the less the enjoyment of the adventure. And so it is with life.

Yet, excess baggage accumulates. It accumulates in our physical lives, and it accumulates in our emotional lives which in turn contributes to mental stress.

Continuously accumulating baggage doesn’t work well in either the physical or the emotional realms of our lives. At some point, we need to say “enough” to accumulating more and “enough” to continuing to carry what is burdening us.

Creating space in our lives means selectively letting go. Have you kept a sweater that you have never worn? Have you kept your old dressing gown even though you were given a lovely new one for Christmas? Have you acquired a new set of dishes but not parted with the set that has 2 plates and 3 saucers missing?

The web offers some decluttering tips and sites.

Spring Cleaning

Our grandmothers held annual spring cleaning.

Items that were still useful but not needed were passed on. This required letting go of  sayings like “someday I might use that,” or “someday I might be that size again”.

Jamming our closet full actually has the affect of making our world less spacious.

It is useful to spring clean our inner lives as well. It may be as small as parting with birthday cards from people we hardly recall. In other cases, it may be letting go of a long held resentment or fear or revisiting a belief that has become dysfunctional.

Over time, we  clutter our lives with thoughts and feelings that weight us down – that interfere with the adventure of life. We become burdened with emotional and mental baggage that interferes with creativity and productivity. Eventually, we become so burdened that our vision of the future is obstructed and our energy is depleted.

Emotional baggage can often be thought of as “unfinished business”. For some reason, we hang on to the emotional component of events and relationships that are long since over. Yet, for us, they are not finished. We are still wanting someone to say “I am sorry”. We are still looking for recognition from a parent who is gone or absent. We continue nurturing a wound that won’t heal because we keep opening it.

Effortless decluttering

Sometimes dealing with the clutter of our lives means simply letting go of the item, thought, or feeling. At other times, what is required to is to deal with the unfinished business. Letting go does not mean you have to deal with something. Sometimes, you can just let it go.

Deciding to let go

When feelings and thoughts weight us down, it is time to consider letting go. The issues could be large or small, related to relationships or material things, social media that has gotten out of control, or a career direction that is no longer viable.

When new circumstances enter our lives, letting go may require adopting a new reality, whether permanent or temporary. For example, when illness interrupts our lives, it is important to stop expecting life to be normal.  During Covid 19, we all experienced the need to adapt to new demands and restrictions. Being able to see the pandemic as a unique, time-limited period was key to letting go of expectations.

Making space

Just as decluttering your material goods gives you physical space, dealing with emotional issues gives you emotional and mental space. There is more room for joy, kindness, playfulness, creativity, and productivity. You literally feel lighter, your stress is reduced, and your focus is sharpened. There is new found energy available for your personal goals. You free  yourself from responsibility that was misplaced.

What should go?

• Are you hanging on to a relationship that has actually ended? The other person may have moved on.
• Are you regretting a mistake you made years ago?
• Has guilt or inadequacy become part of your excess baggage?
• Are you harboring resentment about events long since past?
• Are you carrying confusion around because you have not clarified what‘s important?
• Do you keep overextending yourself to accomplish tasks that are questionable in terms of their importance?
• Are you still involved in a friendship that is essentially toxic, but you hesitate to end it?

Why hang on?

• Hanging on to an unhealthy relationship will not get it back.
• Hanging on to resentment will not bring an apology.
• Hanging on to guilt will simply delay forgiving yourself.
• Hanging on to fear will not make you more brave.
• Hanging on to the need to be perfect will not make you flawless.
• Hanging on to a sense of unfairness does not correct an injustice.
• Hanging on to an unsubstantiated belief doesn’t make it correct.

The list goes on. We hang on because we feel pressure to comply with certain social expectations. We hang on with the hope of revenge. We want to punish someone, perhaps even accuse them over and over of betraying us. We have all met the divorcee who is still badmouthing their former spouse a decade later. In other instances, we carry the excess baggage thinking that, in some way, it protects us.

There is no one answer to why we hang on to what we do. We may hang on to different things for different reasons. The essence of why we hang on maybe to avoid personal responsibility. Blaming external circumstances, or may be the system provides us with the reason for our unhappiness or failure. The sense of being a victim frequently hides behind unfinished business.

How to get started

Lightening your load starts with naming the excess baggage and the unfinished business you have. What is weighing you down? What are you struggling to let go of?

Remember, not all unfinished business has to be finished. Sometimes you can just decide to let it go. Sometimes, it can be as simple as saying, “I am done with that.”

Here is where writing can be helpful

• Sitting in the silence of your own presence with oversized index cards, name the extra luggage you are carrying. Put only one name/label at the top of each card.
• Sort the labels into two piles: things I am willing to let go of (even if you don’t yet know how) and things I am not ready to let go of.
• Write the story of each unfinished business or excess baggage below the name. Deena Metzger in Writing for your life suggests writing the story in five sentences.
• On the back of the card, explore your understanding of how this event or relationship became heavy and why you have continued to carry it around.
• Consider the implications of letting it go.

Recommended readings

Think again: The power of knowing what you don’t know by Adam Grant is an encouraging read. Be ready to learn to question your opinions about people and ideas. Well known Brene Brown in her review of Think again  says, “Adam Grant weaves together research and storytelling to help us build the intellectual and emotional muscle we need … to change.”

Five things we cannot change: And the happiness we find by embracing them by David Richo. A seasoned therapist, the author offers the perspective that there are certain facts that we cannot change – the unavoidable “givens” of human existence: everything changes and ends; things do not always go according to plan; life is not always fair; pain is part of life, and people are not loving and loyal all the time. By letting go of our resistance to these givens, life gets lighter. Richo blends western psychology with Eastern spirituality and provide practical exercises.

Research

Opening up by writing it down (Third Edition): How expressive writing improves health and eases emotional pain, by James Pennebaker and Joshua Smyth, leading experts in the field of therapeutic writing, describe how taking just a few minutes to write about deeply felt personal experiences or problems may help you. They incorporate findings from hundreds of recent studies that document extensive new information on specific health benefits.

Writing Strategy of the Month (June 2021):

June 2021 newsletter uses the metaphor of a traveler overloaded with excess baggage.

Metaphor

A metaphor compares one thing to another in a figurative sense. By using a metaphor, we bypass logic. We can describe an aspect of life by comparing it to something actually unrelated, but that projects a particular quality. A metaphor conjures up a simple image.

For example:

• My test was a breeze.
• He is as strong as an ox.
• She is behaving like an entitled princess.
• My upbringing was a nightmare.
• Their life is a bed of roses.

When you think of your life, what metaphor would describe the life you’re leading?

Once you have chosen a metaphor, expand the metaphor by personalizing it. Example: My life is like a roller derby. Everyone else seems so aggressive. I just keep going round and round. I feel the pressure to win. In order to continue, I intend to …. 

Photo Question of the month

What shall I let go?

Please begin your writing with, “I am letting go of [something on your list],

to make space for [something new that you want to be doing]”.